I’ve decided that instead of pining away for Paul, I’ll do a little flirting with Ryder Davis. Remember Ryder Davis is the guy who thinks I’m stunning. I did friend request him and spent half an hour looking through his photos and reading his captions.
I sent him a message: “You’re funny. Your comments and captions make me laugh. Do you write?”
He replied, “I’d like to write more, but I’m better with quips than lengthier compositions. By the way, I want to be you. You seem to go everywhere. The next time you travel, can I cram myself into your carry-on luggage?
He wants to cram himself into my luggage. How about he ram himself into my vagina. I’m horrible, I know.
I told him that he can just come with me. I long for a travel partner who is also my lover. I didn’t say the latter to him, but it’s true. Sweet dreams.